Happy 2011

"May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. Use the gifts that you have received and pass on the love that has been given to you. Be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge sink in and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love."
~unknown 

Merry Christmas

When we focus on what we have, instead of what we don't, we become grateful and filled with joy.  That is my wish for everyone this Christmas Eve.  Peace, joy, and gratitude.  The birth of a baby boy fulfilled it all.  Jesus is the ultimate Christmas gift.  This Christmas I am praying for those that don't know our King to find Him and worship Him.  For those that do know Him, but have forgotten His promises, renewal.  Merry Christmas to all, safe travels, and warm, generous hearts for a new 2011.

love to all,
Sarah

Redefining Christmas

Christmas time is here...happiness and cheer.  I find myself this year redefining Christmas at 33 years of age, and well, it's really a trip.  I always have had a nature to please people...to be everything to everyone, all my life.  This is unrealistic.  I know.  It's no secret now, that I haven't had a relationship with my parents or any of my family in over a year.  It's been a really hard year for me, honestly.  Just ask my friends and husband.  However, nothing compares to 2008 finding out that David had a huge tumor growing from his outer hip bone and the waiting, nail biting, to find out if it was malignant, or benign.  His surgery was December 17th that year, and it was a long painful recovery, in which he still worked, building our business, shooting 38 weddings and many sessions, in alot of pain.  I look back on that, and am amazed at how we all held it together, because I was terrified, and so was he.  Because God has been so very good to the Colemans, it was benign.  During that trying time, I learned to lean on my favorite scripture, which I quote often, to all that it can help.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

The perfect word of Christ did bring me that peace that "transcends all understanding" during the end of 2008, but this last year, I have not had that peace.  It escaped me.  I tried to pray, and was still mad.  I was so filled with anger, hurt, and upset; processing such a jumbled mess of emotions that ranged from sad to mad, and back again.  I had been abandoned by those that supposedly loved me unconditionally and I couldn't believe it.  I still can't, really.  I have grieved it all, as you might have seen in previous entries here.  Just in the last 2 months am I embracing life and this season, without my family.  The holidays bring thoughts of memories, nostalgia, good times with family.  I'm just holding on to those.  They were good, so I will leave them in my memory as such.  Some weren't at all good.  I'm letting those go.  I am coming to allow myself to enjoy the holidays this year, without my family.  Last year, honestly, I did not.  I was miserable and sad.  This year I am embracing the joy of the present with Maya and Noah, with David, with our friends.  I doubt things with my family will ever change, so that meant, I had to change.  Roll with the punches, they say, right?  So having done that, here I am, December 2nd...allowing myself to get excited about Christmas, listening to Christmas music without crying, looking forward to what my life and those that have chosen to be in it will bring.  I am not out to please anyone anymore in my family for Christmas, it's feeling quite nice.  *sigh of relief*  I just get to be me, unpretentious me, enjoying the holidays in a new way.  It's funny how we adapt and change with age and circumstances thrust upon us.  In that comes growth, and I am growing, learning, and loving this time.  I have much to be grateful for, it's time to live, love and laugh for Christmas!   True family is who we make it.

Here are my top 20 things I have to be thankful for this Christmas:

20. Church on Christmas Eve with acapella Christmas carols, candles, and the peace that comes with that special night

19. Mistletoe because I like to catch sweet kisses underneath it now and then from Mr. Coleman
18. White Christmases, with pretty sparkly lights shining through the snow
17. The spirit of giving to one another, the pure joy of watching someone open something you were excited to give them
16. Grace that allows people to be just a little kinder during the Holidays...well, most people. ;)  Peace on Earth and good will towards men
15. Hot chocolate with a candy cane haging off the side...and lotsa marshmallows
14. Baking and icing sugar cookies with the kids and David
13. Christmas music that allows me to get lost in the Season
12. My nativity that keeps me focused on the real reason we celebrate Christmas.
11. My Christmas tree and all the keepsake ornaments on it that remind me of the last 9 years of our togetherness as a family
10.Sobriety and the miracles that exist because of it
09. Love--because it exists, I am whole
08. My home, my refuge, my shelter - it's where my heart is ;)
07. A lucrative business that allows us to be comfortable and give to others
06.The good health of all I hold dear
05. My dearest friends who accept me flaws and all, as I accept them.  I don't just like them, I love them
04. The joyful little funny dogs that melt my heart, Tatoes and Frankie
03. 2 children I love with all my heart like my own, but are not mine, Maya and Noah
02.The gift of marriage to my best friend and soulmate, David
01. The birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ

Merry Christmas,
Sarah

Get it?

Do you ever just marvel at your ever changing reality?  Life is not what I thought it would be...and I am not saying this as a bad thing, just a fact.  I rather like my life, for the most part.  People come in and out of your life.  People you thought would be there forever leave, people you thought would be temporary, stay, children change, you figure out who they are is not who you thought they were, or get confirmation that they are actually who you always knew they were.  This is all just random rambling unless you know the ins and outs of my life.  However, I am still just so totally bewildered by our ever changing inner-connectedness.  It's pretty amazing, all this inner-"woven-ness".  We all change, some for the better, some not much, and some alot, but everyone eventually changes.  We all connect like a big dot to dot grid, some lines are erased and others just continue to connect to more dots. Nothing really stays the same, friendships evolve or fade, spouse relationships deepen, trust in others comes and goes, those we respect amaze or dissapoint us. Even our thoughts, opinions, goals, dreams and wants change with age, maturity, realizations, and education.  Nothing is forever, except for Christ's love for us and hopefully our love for Him.  So if that is the one constant, in a world of ever-changing variables, why do we fight the changes?  Because change is uncomfortable, so is personal growth, so is letting go, giving up, and knowing when to fight.  Isn't this all just a lesson in adaptation, maturation, and age?  Aren't we supposed to be learning and maybe taking some very important notes as we go?  How do so many people go through this life and still not "get it"?  Am I "getting it"?  Only time will tell.

Just for me

Sometimes God just drops in your lap something you need to hear:

There is tremendous relief in knowing that His love to me is utterly realistic, based at every point on prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery can disillusion Him about me, in the way I am so often disillusioned about myself, and quench His determination to bless me. There is, certainly, great cause for humility in the thought that He sees all the twisted things about me that my fellow-men do not see (and I am glad!), and that He sees more corruption in me than that which I see in myself (which, in all conscience, is enough). There is, however, equally great incentive to worship and love God in the thought that, for some unfathomable reason, He wants me as His friend, and desires to be my friend, and has given His Son to die for me in order to realize this purpose.

-James I (J. I.) Packer

'Tis Upon Us

Do you ever feel like you have so much to say you just don't even know where to begin??  That was the month of October for me, packed full of stuff, not really bad, or great, just stuff.  Which is why I had one measley entry here during that month, which was not even something I wrote.  Ugh...  So instead of beginning...on anything I have to say.  I shall just start November anew.  The holidays are once again upon us, and while I am trying to muster some excitement, I am starting to feel they are overrated.  I love to decorate for the holidays, that will probably not change, but it's just one day in November, and one day in December, and then boom, the New Year; which, may I add, will mark one year of blogging for me.  Yippee!
 Ah...Holidays.  Cooking the whole Thanksgiving meal by myself, the stress of finding gifts for kids that have everything, my dwindling Christmas card list, and the rememberance that I have no family to celebrate with.  Oh goody.  Well, to be more positive, I WILL find some good in the upcoming Holidays this year, just not sure where yet.  Most likely in doing for others and focusing on my husband and friends, those things always bring me joy.  Might need a cattle prod, but I WILL get there.  Remind me of this.

Lorica

I arise today Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity,
Through a belief in the Threeness,
Through confession of the Oneness
Of the Creator of creation.
I arise today
Through the strength of Christ's birth and His baptism,
Through the strength of His crucifixion and His burial,
Through the strength of His resurrection and His ascension,
Through the strength of His descent for the judgement of doom.
..... I arise today
Through God's strength to pilot me;
God's might to uphold me,
God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look before me,
God's ear to hear me,
God's word to speak for me,
God's hand to guard me,
God's way to lie before me,
God's shield to protect me,
God's hosts to save me
From snares of the devil,
From temptations of vices,
From every one who desires me ill,
Afar and anear,
Alone or in a multitude.

Patrick of Ireland

Must See TV From Me~Hilarious.

So how wrong would it be to have my consultations watch this??  LOL!

My Mimi

I got to actually see my Mimi this month. It was a great visit, and as her memory faded in and out, it reminded me that time is short and precious. It was a blessing to get to see her for more reasons than one!! :)

Always the proud dog-mom

My furkids posing for the camera.

September 16th is Stepfamily Day!

Happy National Step-family Day!

I Am Their Stepmother
I am their stepmother,

And I am proud to be,

God has given me this important job,

And it is Him I aim to please.



I am their stepmother,

A promise to them I have made,

To guide them and protect them,

And to teach them in God's ways.



I am their stepmother,

In some ways different,

Some the same,

No matter how I'm seen by the outside world,

I always know my place.



I am their stepmother,

Their father's partner for life,

I will show them God's love,

in the face of momentary strife.



I am their stepmother,

I will struggle,

And I will cry.

When their innocence is threatened,

I will stand,

And I will fight.



For they are the future,

They are precious,

They are worthy,

And I will try,

To give them everything within my power,

Everything that is right.



I understand if I receive no credit,

I am prepared to accept all blame,

All the wonderful joys of having a place in their lives,

Are worth all the tears and pain.



They have taught me the meaning of selfless love,

The value of every second of life.

I am so blessed to see the world,

And myself,

Through my step-children's eyes.

-Poem from Southernshellegirl's blog

Testing 123

Now I can blog from my phone!  Pix and all!! Woot!
Trying this out
Sent from Sarah's iPhone

@!$#%&*@&#^*&%*@#%$&*%@$

Well, yeah so here's my thing today...  I have slipped back into potty-mouthedness, yep it's a word.  Maybe just my word.  Not that I have ever completely kicked the potty-mouth...infact, I just curb it's influx of nastiness, but it usually remains just under the surface.  Just sneak up and scare me, and see what comes out of my mouth.  Having kids around every other week has made me aware of my use of such words.  On weeks they are home, I find myself using what I can best describe as replacement words.  Motherfudgekins, shazam, shootfire, poopface, crappenhagen, doody-brown, bullshizzle, bootyhead, turd-licker, fart-knockers, jackwad, stinky potty-tush, among many others.  Then when I hear the kids repeat these stupid words, I feel even worse.  Great, way to go step-mom (guess it's better than the alternative).  When the kids are not home, I find myself using the big-girl words that I incorporated into my vocabulary around age 11.  I really hate it at times because I will be talking to a friend, letting them know I am praying for them, or talking about my love for Jesus, or the miracles that have been worked in my life; then fast forward the conversation about 5 minutes to the next subject and I am dropping bombs like Hiroshima.  What is that??  It's like I can't find any more effective nouns, adjectives or adverbs to get my point across?  HELP!  So I feel like I should start eff-bombs anonymous.  Hi, my name is Sarah and I curse my face off.  Hello, Sarah.  I have knocked lots of other non-productive vices in my life, why is this one so ingrained into my language?  I have tried to do the whole curse jar thing...that's a joke, I just end up with lots of my $$ in a jar...so what?  A reward to go buy something special for cursing like a sailor? -Sweet.  So I guess, just pray for my potty-mouth because it certainly is NOT a true reflection of what's in my heart.  I'm pretty frustrated with my lack of verbal discipline.  Grrr.

Armchair Time-Machine

    Rain, sweet rain is here.  Thank you, Lord.  It's another day, Wednesday actually!  It's September 1st and I'm itching to get out the Fall stuff!  My hubby is going to be 35 here in 2 weeks...wow.  You always hear people talk about time, especially older people, going faster and faster as the years pass.  When I was younger I would just roll my eyes and think, ah, there's lots of time for everything.  Now in my early-mid thirties...well, I am realizing it's true, the old people knew their stuff and I am becoming one of them.  We have been letting Maya drive the Element in parking lots and around a few residential areas...wow again.  Maya 14 and 1/2...driving.  This time next year she will be driving us with her permit.  Oh boy.  Gonna hafta hem that all up in prayer...lots and lots and lots...and maybe some anti-anxiety meds.
    I was thinking about 10 years ago what I was doing at this time, September 1, 2000 today and sharing that with David.  I was getting out of a really dysfunctional relationship I had been in for 2 and 1/2 years, and relishing being single.  I was bitter, skeptical, distrustful.  My relationship with God was not where it should be, but I was trying to live honestly.  I prayed sporadically, I didn't go to church.  I was a smoker, smoking about a pack a day.  I had 4 years clean under my belt.  I was hanging with friends, discussing politics, current events, and still educating myself on how and why things work the way they do in our world.  I was getting ready to move into my friend's boyfriend's rental house.  I was really excited to get out of my triplex, to get a pet, and get into a nicer  neighborhood in Springfield.  I was working at ATT and was fresh out of training, making big money in "smits", our incentive card. Ha...how that would be a joke towards the end of my employment in 2006.  I had in my mind a plan to start school again, after all, I already had 2 years under my belt.  ATT and the money I was making, way more than my college grad friends, quickly made me realize, I could make more working there than finishing my degree.  How sad.  The allure of bonuses, and quick cash, was too enticing.  I had just gotten a "Rachel from Friends" haircut...layers and such, but with my dark hair ended up looking more like Monica Lewinsky who was still fresh in people's minds.  I had never ever used color on my hair at this point. Ha!  I rarely cooked, I went out to eat with friends almost every night and was addicted to Bangkok City Thai food during this time.  Ah, some Pad Thai Woon Sen, 3 stars!  I loved sushi, but could rarely afford to eat it.  I was much smaller than I am now.  I had a membership at Ozarks Fitness, and was working out twice a day before work, and after.  I went out to Jordan Creek sometimes on the weekends, or Remington's on ladies night Thursdays.  I loved to dance.  I would hang out with Kelley sometimes at her peach colored house on John street, Kaitlyn was still a baby, and loved Teletubbies, and I loved watching them right along with them.  Most of my friends had kids, and I longed for that too, but the right guy had to come first.  I was driving a maroon Toyota Camry and blasting my "burnt" mix Cd's as loudly as possible;  Counting Crows, Fiona Apple, Outkast, CeeLo, Blink 182 and Limp Biskit among many more I can't even remember.  I had dial-up internet through a small provider and a Nokia analog cell phone the size of my head...recently upgraded from my killer blue pager.  I was carrying a Dooney and Bourke purse and loving chenile turtleneck sweaters, tigh pants under them, and blunt toed zipper boots, I had all colors, brown, red, black, even black and silver rocker boots!  Most of my home decor came from Big Lots and the Dollar Tree.  I would occasionally treat myself to a few clearance items from Pier One, at that time, that was the ONLY cool home decor store in Springfield.  I pretty much watched MTV non stop when my TV was on, the Real World was my favorite show.  My favorite movies were Reality Bites and Titanic.  I was a pretty happy girl, but I really lacked and longed for that one special person in my life, and little did I know, that in 13 months, I would meet him, and I would be happier and more in love than I'd ever dreamed.  Alot has happened, and changed in 10 years; kids, dogs, marriage, tumors, deaths, successes, failures, church, community, buying and selling homes, cars, employment for "the man", to becoming "the man" in self-employment, technology, good times, bad times, and everything in between.  INSANE. 
My entire point in examining this mini-time warp is to glorify our God.  I don't smoke anymore. I am still friends with Kelley.  I am married to the man of my dreams.  I do not have to work at a job that I hate.  I am a stepmom to two bright, funny, amazing children.  I have better friends now than I have ever had.  I have the time to give back to my community.  I have an active relationship with God and involved at church.  My attire, home, clothing, lifestyle, have all been upgraded.  I am self-employed and loving it with our growing photography business.  I still enjoy music, I don't go dancing anymore, I still enjoy Thai food, and tons of other ethnic yumminess.  I can even cook--I have even plumped up :( !  Could I have envisioned what 10 years would bring?  Nope.  Not even if I tried. 
    In the last 10 years, there have been some very bad, very sad times in there as well, it's not all been peaches and roses and sunshine, make no mistake.  I have had my share of really crappy moments, decisions, and hurts.  I am not at all trying to pretend my life has been some grand fairytale of giddy, make-you-wanna-barf moments, but rather focus more attention to the positive blessings and realize they outweigh the dreariness by far.  God carries us through the ugly stuff, as well as the great stuff.  And I realize, He's always been by my side, even when I wasn't asking Him to be there. I'm so grateful, because I CAN see what my life COULD have been. So I'm thinking of 10 years from now; what will that bring?   Imagine! ;)  Glory to God in the highest!

Yeah, I don't even know why

Just because...why not.

http://www.rathergood.com/biscuits

Are you who you want to be?

This is your Life

yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
yesterday is a promise that you've broken
don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes
this is your life and today is all you've got now
yeah, and today is all you'll ever have
don't close your eyes
don't close your eyes

this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
when the world was younger and you had everything to lose
yesterday is a kid in the corner
yesterday is dead and over
this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
when the world was younger and you had everything to lose

don't close your eyes
don't close your eyes
don't close your eyes
don't close your eyes

this is your life are you who you want to be
this is your life are you who you want to be
this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, are you who you want to be
this is your life, is it everything you dreamed it would be
when the world was younger and you had everything to lose
and you had everything to lose

-Switchfoot

Step-mommin' it on the real

I don't write about my relationship with my step-kids often. It's a delicate situation in which, if you know me well, you know the deal, the drama, and the way we choose to handle our situation. If you don't, well, you see us on the outside, smiling in pictures, doing normal family stuff, attending church, eating out, going to a movie. Most of the time, it's pretty normal, but the reality is, step-parenting sucks alot of the time. Period. If I have to explain why, well, you might as well stop reading now. I often have referred to myself in conversation with friends as the "Betty Crocker" of step-moms, not because I am conceited, or just enjoy tooting my own horn, but rather, the fact that I care deeply, love even more deeply, and have been really pretty darn awesome to my step-kids through the almost 9 years I have been in their lives. Again, if you know our family, you know exactly of what I speak, there's no need to elaborate. I have known a few step-moms in the past that hate their step-kids and really treat them as if they are lepers in their own homes. This is not the case around here--in fact, that's laughable. I have other really kind step-mom friends, as well as visiting the "Second Wives Cafe" and the "Childless Step-moms" on-line communities, that remind me I am not alone, the things I am dealing with and going through are not specific to me. Universally speaking, most divorced bio-moms (but not all--wink wink) resent and are extremely jealous and competitive with step-moms. We are a threat. Did you know that? That we step-mothers are trying to replace you? This seems to be the common misconception, that if we actually love and form bonds with their children, that we are scary and evil and objects of gossip, negativity, and contempt. While I do love my step-kids dearly, I realize and respect the importance of their healthy relationships with their bio-parents. What kind of horrible person would I be to ever come between that? I'll tell you what: the perfunctory evil stepmother.
 Most of the time, I am damned if I do, and damned if I don't in my situation. So I throw caution to the wind, and know that deep down the children love me, and I love them, and that's enough, to heck with the rest. So what if my step-daughter has to hide our relationship from her mother and only text me sporadically then delete them, so mom won't see that we have been talking. So what? So what if she is scared to death to tell this woman her real feelings about her anxiety, church, me, neglect, and much much more. So what? That is where I finally am; Just so what... My step-son is a Mama's boy through and through, I am the devil to him most of the time for that very reason. Buuuut, we have our tender moments too, laughs, hugs, great conversations, I love you's and sweet little notes...and always have. He feels so guilty for loving me, and knowing that, I allow him to just be. If he wants to love on me he can, if not, that's ok too. Bio-mom and I will never see eye to eye. We are morally, spiritually, and mentally existing in two totally separate universes. This, the children know. I used to give her the benefit of the doubt that she was a kind person like I was, and just wanted her kids to be happy as she always claimed. The disclaimer there was happy with HER, at HER house. As time has gone on, I could cite innumerable instances of jealous, guilt ridden, competitive, juvenile, passive-aggressive behavior, using the kids as pawns and mouthpieces. What I came to realize is love conquers all. It just doesn't matter. As much as she tries, and many times succeeds, in sabotaging our family dynamic, I still stand behind love, kindness, genuine communication and the power of a praying step-mom. Sometimes I just chuckle with pity for her, other times I wanna throw things. What on earth did I get myself into?
So on the eve of Maya going into High School and little Noah going into 6th grade, the time, days, minutes, seconds, just seem so precious. They are growing up right before our very eyes, and I don't wanna miss the good stuff. The negativity I have learned to live with, and ignore. In the meantime, the children tell their mom what she wants to hear for attention, they throw me under the bus, and most times their Dad too. And we continue to smile and love them - no matter what. This cannot be taken away. The real Christ-like love we are all supposed to be showing to one another is unconditional. While I have not received unconditional love and support from my own biological parents, I have learned through that hurt that these precious children, bestowed to me by God, need our unconditional love and support. A great caring friend reminded me the other day when we were dealing with yet another scenario of outright lies spoken against us, that I can never relent on being who I am. She was so right on, and I appreciated her boldness and passionate plea--not that I was giving up anyway...ha. Sadly, there are things going on that we are aware of that are very sad, and knowing that; they need us even more. I will never be their mom, I don't want to be. I do love being their stepmom, it's a joy in my heart. It's hard continually being made out as someone you aren't, but I know that in the long run, goodness always prevails. I would not trade one second of this life. My stepdaughter told me when she was 10, in tears, in the middle of my bed, that she wished that I could be her mom. The sweetness of that statement absolutely brought me to tears, I assured her that I would love it if she was my daughter too. I also assured her that God gave her the Mom that she has for a reason, and her Dad too. I told her that I believe God allowed her to have a relationship with myself and her stepfather as a wonderful bonus. I did the right thing, as I could have never mentioned anything about her mom and that importance. I will never forget that conversation as long as I live. It was enough. ...And no matter whatever happens, I will always be their step-mom who loves them, unconditionally.

If God is for us, who can be against us?
Romans 8:31


{sidenote: Maya just came out of her room, can't sleep and asked me if we could talk. She's very nervous about her first day of high school, we talked, I reminded her of what a beautiful, special kid she is...and to not shoot death ray looks to others (she does this to cope with her social anxiety, a natural repellent of sorts) and she will be fine. After sharing a bite of leftover spaghetti pie we agreed we will pray in the morning over breakfast about her day. She just climbed back up to her top bunk, and yelled, "I love you" to me in the family room...I love you too, Maya}

Do Something

He must become greater; I must become less.
John 3:30

http://www.innercityoutreach.net/

http://raphahouse.org/

http://www.ijm.org/

http://www.activewater.org/

http://www.volunteermatch.org/

http://www.polarisproject.org/

http://www.prisonersofgreed.org/kennel-examples.html

http://www.humantrafficking.org/combat_trafficking/advocacy

http://www.casaswmo.org/Default.aspx

Our Peace

Horrible, evil, mean-spirited, unkind, immature, insecure, hateful, user, unhappy, lonely, childish, silly, sad, pathetic, ridiculous, mentally ill, manipulative, liar, damaging, jealous, lazy, self-serving, spineless, morally bankrupt, untrustworthy, competitive, self-righteous, brainwasher, flakey, in denial, frustrated, and pitied.

Do you know anyone like this? If you do...make sure that you do not cease in praying for them, and NEVER give up on His justice and mercy. It leaves peace to be able to rest and go about our lives in the midst of insanity. The devil attacks us and our loved ones through people that posess these qualities, and then Jesus settles our matters for us. We never have to do anything other than pray, isn't that freeing? What a wonderful peace that brings. It's taken me years to learn this, and with the "peace that transcends all understanding" (Philipians 4:6-7) our anger is taken from us, and we know that once we turn it all over to God, that it's His to deal with, we just have to keep being a good person, and stay faithful.

Romans 12:14-21 says:
Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!
Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.
Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord.
Instead, “If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.”
Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.

Furthermore, Christian author, Lewis Smedes says:
When you give up vengeance, make sure you are not giving up on justice. The line between the two is faint, unsteady, and fine...Vengeance is our own pleasure of seeing someone who hurt us getting it back and then some. Justice, on the other hand, is secure when someone pays a fair penalty for wronging another even if the injured person takes no pleasure in the transaction. Vengeance is personal satisfaction. Justice is moral accounting...Human forgiveness does not do away with human justice.

Becoming Whole

Deep within there is a glorious and terrible empty space - loneliness. It is out of sight, pushing us to our best and to our worst. Behind every effort to make a friend - Behind ambition - Behind pride - Behind gossip - Behind memories of your mother's kitchen - Loneliness. We were created with the space carefully planted in our hearts. God created us with the loneliness that moves the heart to others, the loneliness that moves the heart at last to God. Is it what moves us to become whole.
-David Kidd

Maturity

I started reading this short "quote" series on Christian Maturity by James Packer, I love it. I just wanted to share. While I like to think I a "mature" on some points, I am a total Kindergartener on others. I originally had been sending these to Maya day by day, as she has expressed so much excitement about her spiritual growth since she's been back from CIY. I'm encouraged with great joy to see her discover God's love for her; it's amazing. I thought these would be really relate-able for her, but also found them to be pretty universal for all of us, no matter the age. Hope you enjoy as much as I did.

The first mark of Christian maturity is the ability to deal constructively with reality, to face facts, to not cover up reality or call it something else, but to deal with it as it is. Mature people do not kid themselves.

The second mark is, adapting quickly to change. We all experience change, whether it be physical, at work, in the family, or whatever. I am amazed at how much some people change through the years while I remain exactly the same! Immature people resist change. It makes them nervous. But the mark of maturity is to adapt to change because change is inevitable.

The third mark of Christian maturity is freedom from the symptoms of tension and anxiety. The worried look, the frown, the ulcers, the palpitations of the heart - come because you are upset, anxious and worried. Maturing means you have begun to see that God is in control of this world. He is working out purposes that you do not always understand, but you accept it. He will take you through the deep water, not drown you in it. Maturity means you are learning to trust.

Fourth, it means to be satisfied more with giving than receiving. Some of you know that the joy of Christmas is not getting presents, but giving them. To see the joy in someone else's face when they get something they either need or want. That is a sign you are growing up. You are discovering the true values of life.

The fifth mark is, to relate to others with consistency, helpfulness and mutual satisfaction. Maturity is learning to get along with other people, to be a help, not a hindrance, to contribute to the solution and not to be always a part of the problem.

Finally, Christian maturity is sublimating and redirecting anger to constructive ends. Maturity is the ability to use the adrenaline that anger creates, not to lose your temper and add to the problem, but to correct a situation or to contribute to changing the nature of the difficulty.

The lazy girl's guide to eh, whatever. Installment 1 of ?

So I went to the store today, loving the fact that I got such a good, close parking spot. You know, that spot that's RIGHT next to the handicapped spots, and close enough to the entrance to give yourself a mental high-five? It's a real rarity to get that spot--go me! It's hot...who wants to walk on the radiating pavement very far, right? So I went in, did my thing, and came out to unload my groceries into my Element, and to my dismay, I was in a dilemma. Do I take my cart alllllll the way back into the store, or ditch it on the sad patch of concrete encased grass, only to get funny looks from others as I hop the curb, so the cart boy can fetch it next time he's on the prowl? Eh, I'm in my 30's...who cares what others think--they've done the same lazy thing before! After all, the cart boys get paid to take that clever little cart-herder machine that creates a tidy line of nested wire-basket clones to wheel back into the store, right? I'm providing them with some job security, which is sadly, more than my friends left at ATT, have these days. Anyhow, close parking spots rock, having to walk your cart allllll the way back into the store, or hoofing it to the nearest cart return really seems to defeat the entire purpose of getting that sweet spot in the first place!
Don't judge me.
Stay tuned, more lazy installments to come...or maybe not. I dunno.

Love? Love.

Is there anything to be gained by confrontation and the airing of feelings and issues with people that we are in conflict with?

Wellll....I guess that all depends on the issue, and the person with whom you are talking. I have always been a huge advocate of the importance of honesty and communication, it's the reason my marriage rocks. When it comes to friendships and family, it's just not always that simple. The older I get, the more fascinated I become by human nature, emotion, ego, motives, depth, or lack of...I will say it once again, people are a trip! I find it interesting when you learn the "why" of it all. What makes people do the crazy things they do, or say. I am very analytical, and can sometimes over-think things to death, while at the same times, I also see things that others may not. It's kind of a catch 22 in my personality to be able to have the spirit of discernment, while also not caring to discern because of my need to understand and comprehend the why of things. Anyhow, I know that we are commanded as Christians to love everyone. Can this really be possible, I keep asking myself? Because if we are really honest with ourselves, there are those people that have wronged us one way or another that really hurt our spirit. It's hard to say, I "love" this person that hurt my child, or my husband, or me. Still, we are commanded to do this, and knowing that, brings forth our accountability to God. So I suppose I try to rationalize people's behaviors, in order to try to love them in some way. For instance, person X is unkind or rude to me, and seems generally unhappy all the way around. I could just say, oh well, this person is a moron... orrrrr....I can rationalize that person X is having a rough time and isn't really snubbing me, rather going through something of which I am unaware. If there is something I have done to create a negative reaction out of person X, then I also will examine my own behavior and adjust accordingly.
Now alot of people would say, who cares, right? Sarah, seriously, who cares!? Well, the thing is, God cares. And to be commanded to love one another is NOT easy. It just isn't. Now I, of course, love my inner circle of family and friends and even acquaintances 'til the cows come home, but to branch outside that, to really say I "love" someone I'm not too crazy about; well, it's tough. So how do I go around this?
I prayed about this last night. And with just that instant peace that comes with knowing you turned your issue over to God, I slept well. I awoke to this thought today: To truly forgive and walk in love is to let it go, and not talk about it again. So that is what I am going to do. There is no need to rehash pains, or to "communicate" in any way. Loving someone can be as simple as just wishing them well, and harboring no bad feelings for them. Does that mean they need to be up in your face, or having dinner at your home? Nope. Just simple feelings of kindness. That is sometimes the only way people will allow us to love them. Sometimes communication can be a tool of the devil, or a God given comfort spoken through our lips. But, I am learning that communication is not always the answer. If I allow faith to play it's part, it shouldn't really matter. God is so large, He sees through us, and knows our thoughts before they become our own. Through prayer and scripture all things ARE possible. I am working on "loving" those people that I need to examine in my heart. If for no other reason, than because it's pleasing to God. I may just need to love them from afar. ;)

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law. The commandments, "Do not commit adultery", "Do not murder", "Do not steal", "Do not covet", and whatever other commandment there might be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself". Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.
Romans 13:8-10

Ah..so true!!

This totally made us laugh! We have experienced this scenario before. A bride books us, and then has a family member with an expensive (or not so expensive) camera offer to shoot the wedding for "free". Oh the sadness when that bride gets her wedding photos and realizes the mistake she has made. Sadly, bad wedding photos are forever. This video says it all!

Just a coupla ?'s

When something says it's a "new and improved" formula...and it's a product that's been on the market for say...25 years...then is it safe to assume that the old formula sucks?

Why do we say "excuse me" or "pardon me" when we want someone else to move?  There really is no cause for an excuse or pardon then right?

Some expiration dates say "use by 3-12-10" and some say "sell by 3-12-10".  So on the ones that say to sell it by a certain date, how long is it then good for after it's been sold?  And what if there is just a random date stamped on it with no "use by" or "sell by"??? Ahhhhh!

Did you know we all have little bugs that live in our eyelashes?  Yup--we do. Google it.  It's nasty.

mid-July jazz

Well, it's a girl.  Tatoes has a new sister, Miss Frankie-Boo Coleman.  Frankie is a chihuahua that actually found us, instead of us finding her.  She is adjusting nicely, and loving her new digs.  I am having fun playing dress up with her in Tatoes outgrown clothes.  Hard to believe little Tate was just 7 pounds when we got her, now she weighs in at 12.  Frankie weighs 6 pounds and eats EVERYTHING, she is a very hungry little dog!  I never envisioned us getting another dog, for Tatoes is my dog soulmate...however, little Frankie stole our hearts, and is going to be wonderful company for Tatoes when we are away.  We have always felt guilty leaving Tatoes alone, now she will have a buddy to hang with.  They are really similar in personality, and both just crave "lovins".  We aren't short on that around here, and love snuggling on a warm puppy.  Now David and I don't have to fight over Tatoes anymore, we can take turns!

Maya leaves for CIY in Carbondale, IL tomorrow; I am praying this is going to be a great time for her.  It's a great Christian Summer program for High School age kids.  Reality keeps smacking me that she's going into High School this year!  Doesn't really seem possible she is that age.  Wow...just wow.  Time sure does fly. Seems like just yesterday we were walking holding hands everywhere we went and exchanging "I love you's" until one of us "won" (the last person to say I love you). Ah...sweet memories I will always cherish.

David and I both got the new iPhone 4, so far so good.  I really like mine, the ability to do HD video is sweet, as well as the toggling between apps, and long battery life.  I don't seem to be having any antenna issues that others had complained about.  I really like Face time too...lots of fun to be able to see someone and visit, just a bummer that they have to have the iPhone 4 too, to be able to do it.  iPads are cool as well, and David has a new mistress, her name is iMac...he's in love. :)  His editing time is now almost cut in half, this baby flies!  Good for him, what a killer investment for the biz.  I got to do my first client consultation with the iPad a few days ago.  It was totally awesome.  So much easier than flipping through that clumsy huge portfolio that was 3 years old.  This keeps it new and fresh...totally excellent.  I was able to show my client a full wedding at the venue she had chosen, I just went to that folder and voila...pictures!  Good stuff. 

I have a nasty Summer cold.  ICK!  I feel like dirt.  David had a wedding today, normally I would have gone with him, but I just wasn't up to it today.  So I stayed in bed and watched some movies on the iPad and got all the laundry done.  I had never watched Donnie Darko, and had heard it was interesting and cool...and yeah, it kinda was, interesting concept, but I am just not that cool.  I get so sick of Christians in movies being portrayed as idiots, close-minded bigots, and unintelligent simpletons.  But, I guess that's cool in godless Hollywood.  Anything to escape accountability and morality, because the opposite always sells.  Although I look at films like the Passion of the Christ, (Mel Gibson, for the record, is completely NUTS) and Fireproof (even though the acting left alot to be desired) and how well they did at the box office.  I think people do want more entertainment with relevant thematic Christian messages, but it's just not popular to make those movies, or claim Christ.  Ah, our society...the more depraved the better, I spose.  (Insert frowny face here).  I personally love documentaries, they are my favorite types of movies, and while this may make me a nerd, I like to stay informed about a variety of topics this way.  Typically most of them have some sort of agenda or bias, but nevertheless, even if to play "devil's advocate" with the topic, I come out more educated one way or the other.

Well, it's time for some Nyquil and the snuggling of pups. Here's an eyebrow raising thought for today:

While sitting on the bank of a river one day, I picked up a solid round stone from the water and broke it open. It was perfectly dry in spite of the fact that it had been immersed in water for centuries. The same is true of many people in the Western world. For centuries they have been surrounded by Christianity; they live immersed in the waters of its benefits. And yet it has not penetrated their hearts; they do not love it. The fault is not in Christianity, but in men's hearts, which have been hardened by materialism and intellectualism.

~Sadhu Sundar Singh

Why I love urbandictionary.com

This is hilarious...and alot of it is dead on...and some just giggleworthy!

Word of the day:  indie

1. The term: Short for independent rock. In terms of music it would be independent of major labels/mainstream stuff.

History: grew out from 60s garage, 70s punk, and 80s post punk it started in the mid 80s as alternative/college radio music. Once nirvana hit big the alternative genre split: the popular side was just alternative(Smashing Pumpkins, Hole, No Doubt, etc.) and the other half that wasn't mainstream(by choice or not) became indie rock(Pavement, Sebadoh, Built To Spill, etc).
Some bands have signed to major labels but are still considered indie(Modest Mouse, etc.). Go figure.
Sound: In the begining indie sounded like alternative(because it was) but it grew more experimental and weird. In Britain indie has more of a typical sound like Radiohead, Muse, etc. rather than a definition based on 'the scene.'
The scene: if you think all indie folks are cooler than other people then... well.. you're mostly right. The main point is, don't take the scene and the whole hipster attitude seriously. No one does. And if you do, well, then I'm cooler than you.

2. A gloriously vague term for Independent Music. Basically unsigned or more obscure bands (It's odd that Radiohead and REM are considered indie...). While the indie scene is known for it's ridiculous elitism, this doesn't spill over and hurt what's most important....the music. One of the few genres left that can at least carry a tune without screaming like a moron or crying.

(Examples of Indie music)
80's- Joy Division, Sonic Youth, The Smiths
90's- Pavement, Radiohead, The Pixies, Happy Mondays (Are they considered dance music or indie rock?).
Now- The Shins, Bright Eyes, Death Cab For Cutie/The Postal Service, Rilo Kelly, Modest Mouse.
Indie listener- "Do you guys carry Crooked Rain by Pavement or Closer by Joy Division?
Confused Best Buy employee- "Uhh, no. We do have a wall of My Chemical Romance albums behind you".
Indie listener- "Nevermind"

3. Independent music. The anti-"emo". (well, maybe like emo's second cousin twice-removed with more talent, skill, and IQ).  Indie people generally like their lives.

 the state of being "indie":
1)being unable to talk to anyone about your music.
2)but knowing that, in the process, you're cooler than the people you try to talk to about it.
3)talking to poseurs about Death Cab for Cutie and they had never heard of them before the Twilight New Moon soundtrack came out and suddenly Meet Me on the Equinox is their favorite song.
indie listener: The Shins(before Garden State)? Muse? The XX? Screaming Trees?...anyone? Bueller? anyone?

4. a. Music released on an independent label
    b. Any music slightly left of mainstream
    c. Not always about lost love, sometimes about Christmas in Zoos and inanimate objects breathing.
"Yeah, I'm into Indie"
"You don't look it"
"Do I have to?"

July's word of the month: Acceptance

I'm baaaaaaack! :) Yeah, wow...what a wonderfully fun month June was: Relay for Life, weddings galore, and David's mom's visit, and hosting charity garage sales, and lotsa fun outings to Branson, new iMac for David and iPads for us both, and new iPhone 4's on the wayyyy - busy as all get out!  It's July and we are having a weekend to catch our breath due to a wedding cancellation, and it's actually been such a blessing in disguise. So here's some random ramblings I was thinking about today...

I'm feeling great, like really great.  David and I had a conversation the other night...about me not having a family anymore.  He said, "you know how great our marriage is, most people don't get what we have together.  Yes, you don't have bio-kids, and yes, your parents are from another planet, buuuuut you have ME!!"  ...And what a friend I have in my husband; he's the complete package.  One poignant thing my mom always said to me that keeps resounding in my mind is, "nobody gets it all".  She was right...noone does.  So it's a trade off, in my mind at this point.  Healthy functioning marriage, amazingly fulfilling and lucrative business VS. in my mind, what should have been...  Interesting to ponder.  Then I bring God into play(or rather He brings me into play)...and David and I, for a year or so now, have talked about traveling while doing mission work, or being able to use our photography for good. This sounds strange, I am sure, but I haven't really prayed about God's plan to implement David and I....I'm almost scared to...does that make sense?  Sometimes things manifest that are beyond our control...and what if He takes me outside my comfort zone, and I'm not ready!  I digress... Well, anyway...my point is, there are reasons, God implored reasons, why life is the way it is right now. On your darkest day, with your worst hurt, there are reasons.  I did what God laid on my heart as far as trying to reconcile with true forgiveness and peace...and was stomped into the ground by Satan's handiwork of embittered hearts and sickened souls, resulting in my grief-filled depression this last Winter.  So now I must guard my heart as I move forward. {Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23}.  Sooooooo, I remain faithful, and this, combined with David's unwavering support, amazingly positive friends, a nifty dog-buddy, a functioning relationship with the kids, and my God who promises not to give me more than I can handle, just wait and take in life.  Breath it in.  I'm just sitting tight, relishing in the sweet happy moments of date nights, and girl outings with friends, the joys of shooting a wedding, cuddling my pup, and working for good causes.  Good moments abound, and my estranged family misses out.  I mourn only for a moment, a fleeting thought...then delight in the gifts God keeps giving me, because at the end of the day, I am so grateful for my life, and my family.  God knows my heart...and this thought too, keeps me content, even in strife.  It's ok.  "Acceptance and hope" is the last stage of the of 7 stages of grief, and I have felt them all.  I accept my new life without my family, and hope and pray it will be different some day. In the mean time, I will keep my head up, my heart humble and open, and LOVE my precious life.  It is a good life, and it's amazing to be able to be this happy.  I don't have it all, but I sure love and am grateful for what I do have.

Bizzy-Bizzy

I had truly forgotten how busy summer is...2 weddings last weekend, 2 weddings the week before, Relay Garage sale in the middle of it, set up, preparations, and 2 days worth of sales, etc...Relay for Life is tomorrow night....we are almost there!  Another wedding on Saturday and then David's mom gets here from Albuquerque on Tuesday and will be here for a week.  I am ready for a vacation.  I am slacking on my blog, and I know it...just too much going on!  A little coffee and Alt. Nation will get me through!   Lots of blessings are abundant this time of year and we are grateful!  God is good.  Maybe I will write more in July.... ;)

Happy Memorial Day

What a weekend!  Memorial Day weekend for most people means going to the lake, or decorating graves, or having a BBQ.  For us, it usually means at least 2 weddings, last year it was 3...yes, 3 in one weekend.  This year, we had the pleasure of working with 2 great smalltown couples.  It was really ironic that both days we were headed to the Stockton area too; well, one was actually Jerico Springs, a tad further than Stockton.  From a photography standpoint, we always look forward to ornate ceremonies and receptions, and love the Tower Club, Highland Springs Country Club, Big Cedar, Chateau on the Lake, Wellington Place, and the Grand Ballroom.  But in the all the grandness of those larger venues, sometimes the feeling can get lost. I do have to say there is something so special about the intimate family oriented weddings we were asked to be a part of this last weekend.  Saturday brought us to Stockton, to a small Baptist church and the Stockton Expo Center.  Our bride and groom were High School sweethearts, and their entire day was sweet, personal, simple and meaningful.  These two were married by the groom's father, who really worked their stories into the ceremony, and broke down himself during the vows.  I, without fail, CRY!  I don't think there has been a wedding that I have been to yet, that didn't make me get all teary at some point.  There is something so special about the family members coming together to bless the couple with their heartfelt words and kindness.  I am always amazed by the outpouring from friends and family during these special days.  Everyone works together to get along, even though most families at least have one side that is divorced.  Everyone is happy to be photographed, happy to smile, and devote their time and energy to making the day special for the couple.  Matrons of Honor, and Best Men are precious folks with their toasting and roasting.  There is a reason the bride and groom pick these sweet people to stand up for them.  This wedding was complete with a miniature bride/flower girl, who was decked out head to toe with a little veil and all.  We were taking a picture of her and the bride together at Stockton lake and I was so happy thinking of that little girl's wedding day...someday.  She will look back on that precious photo and see herself as the bride in years to come. *cue tear-filled eyes about to spill*  Our job is special to me because I realize the importance in these photos that are treasures for the family for years to come.  We are creating moments of reflection, and capturing those frozen moments in time.  There will never be another wedding day (hopefully - ha), and we are chosen to capture priceless memories.  It's a big job, we take very seriously; it's as important to David and I, as it is to the couple.
Wedding number 2 on Sunday brought us to our couple's family farm, 900 picturesque acres in Jerico Springs, complete with big red barn, reception tent, the best BBQ ever, and an Amish colony next door.  This couple, too, had been together for 8 years and were High School sweethearts, and drove back to Missouri from where they lived in Pennsylvania to exchange vows.  The groom grew up hunting on the farm, and recalled it as his favorite place as a child, I loved that they were tying the knot somewhere so close to the groom's heart.  The simplicity of the entire day was totally refreshing, all the flowers used were wildflowers from around the property, and they were gorgeous!  I thought they had gone to the florist!  No diva moments, no fussing over hair, and makeup, no worrying about getting the dress dirty for a cool photo op (which of course, we didn't, the bride even picked up a tick in the weeds, but that didn't phase her, she just picked it off the dress and moved on); just relaxed, REAL fun.  Mason jars with lemon, lime, and orange slices in water were coupled with candles for the centerpieces.  We waited for the festivities to begin in Grandma's house, complete with cozy furniture and quilts and afghans galore; so universal, made me miss being a little girl at my Grandma's, and those treasured memories.  The ceremony was in the middle of a mowed field, with hay bale seats, with God shining his goodness down upon the whole bunch.  The best part was the Best Man literally sobbed through his entire toast...not a dry eye in the house, including mine, of course.  The family was so kind to David and I, kept offering us water because it was hot in the sun and we were all sweating, and literally MADE us sit down and eat their prizewinning BBQ, which was great with us!  Sometimes people just view us as paid, hired help and never think to offer us anything (which is ok, we are there to do a job), but these folks made us feel like we were part of their family.  The genuine sincerity was refreshing, and it was neat to be around a functional, loving family...even if it was just for the day.  I teared up again watching the father-daughter dance, so precious and real.  Weddings like these make our job so fun, and make me look forward to the rest of the Summer!
 We are both so blessed to be able to share these moments with each other, working with your spouse is special, and not for everyone.  I am so proud of David and his work, he is always working to improve, and try new things.  I love being the voice of D-Co-Pho, and creating a relationship between us and our clients, and helping people determine what suits them best, what a perfect job.  Sometimes God allows us to feel the calm and contentment that gives us the peace to know we are exactly where we are supposed to be.
To finish up our Memorial Day weekend, we are hanging with the kiddos, and going to a BBQ with some treasured friends later.  Life is good.  Happy Memorial Day to all. Take a moment of silence and remember your loved ones lost today, alive or past.  God Bless.

Well Said...

The world needs men and women.......

who cannot be bought;
whose word is their bond;
who put character above wealth;
who possess opinions and a will;
who are larger than their vocations;
who do not hesitate to take chances;
who will not lose their individuality in a crowd;
who will make no compromise with wrong;
whose ambitions are not confined to their own selfish desires;
who will not say they do it "because everybody else does it";
who are true to their friends through good report and evil report in adversity as well as in prosperity
who do not believe that shrewdness, cunning, and hardheartedness are the best qualities for winning success;
who are not ashamed or afraid to stand for the truth when it is unpopular;
who can say "no" with emphasis, although all the rest of the world says "yes."

~ Dr. Larry M. Groves

Loving Spring Because....

                                        Pineapples are sweet and ripe

         pots overflow with green goodness

     Peach hibiscus are bountiful

     These purple impatiens are impressive

                            new blooms show their faces every day

     dainty flowers are vibrant

                            My orchids are blooming

                                        ...and Berry Trifles are delicious! 

Y oh Y

Oh, how old I am about to sound, but I don't care, here I go...
And as not to offend, this doesn't apply to all...just to some...

Store 1: Hobby Lobby
So I was perusing darn near every aisle at Hobby Lobby looking for some various this-n-thats to place in my spare bedroom and I was on the phone with Theresa.  During my conversation I found myself getting very irritated b/c 2 workers, probably around the ages of 16-20 were talking so loudly I couldn't hear myself on the phone!  I had to go to another aisle.  So that was fine...had their yelling been work related.  It was not.  Loud talking about a party, talking about a co-worker, talking about the "junk" they were burdened with having to mark down for a sale.  I growled under my breath, told Theresa what jerks they were and went on about my business.  I saw them throwing resin figurines into a cart as I walked off, with absolutely NO care whatsoever, one of them broke something and just chuckled.  I get to the register to encounter another young person, that was ridiculously unfriendly, no smile, no greeting, just doing her miserable time, punching the clock, miffed that I had items that she was actually going to need to wrap in packing paper.  Nice.

Store 2: Target
 I too, was all over Target yesterday looking for bath towels, a new iPhone case, blah blah blah....and 2 girls, same age group as the Hobby Lobby boys were wheeling around a cart of misplaced items to put away.  I heard them talking, and one of them was in training and learning what to do from the other one.  I heard them saying "we are never going to get outta here, so who cares anyway". Then the new girl went to put away a misplaced rug, asking for direction, the other girl said just throw it wherever, noone ever really checks anyway.  Then they went on about their business of talking about a Spanish teacher that was a total "douche", without even trying to be quiet about it in my presence, ya know, me; the customer??  Not sure if they were in college or High School, don't really care, just seeing a pattern here.  The most striking thing was the apathetic way in which they spoke, like they had come straight off The Hills (vomit-gag), every word was drawn out, and every eye roll was pronounced.  Missouri wanna-be valley girls, trying to sound cool, overtexted, over electronicized, and completely unenthused and lackadaisical, dying to get off work and doing a crappy job while they are there.  Super.

Store 3: Sam's Club
I am nuts about Sam's Sweet Golden Pineapples, they are HUGE, so off I go to the produce section to grab some fruit and veggies, a few other asundry grocery items and get outta there!  I pull up to the pineapples, and there is a worker there that greets me, he's restocking my favorite yummies, great!  I start sniffing their bottoms to see which ones are ripe, and a friend walks up to pineapple boy.  Apparently this friend works there too, but is off work and has come to Sam's to bother the friend stocking.  They get into a conversation about going somewhere later that evening, who was going to be there, and why both their last paychecks sucked.  I thought yes, I bet their checks did suck, perhaps no incentive to work any harder, to show a more grand work ethic, naaaahhhh, screw it, let's just hang on the pineapples, shoot the breeze and do my time. 

All of these young kids (oh man, I can't believe I am saying this, I feel old) had one thing in common; apathy.  Welcome to Generation Y.  I suppose, it's great that they have jobs at all.  I think the worst part is when you are seeking one on one customer service and the person waiting on you acts as if you have interrupted their conversation.  I needed a new photo id at Sam's a few weeks back, and you would have thought I was a leper the way these young girls looked at me for interrupting their NON-work related conversation.  I found it interesting as they were typing in my info and clicking my picture, they were still carrying on their conversation, as if I wasn't even there.  I just stood there incredulous, the audacity, and the sheer rudeness, has noone ever taught them any better?  Obviously, the answer to that is no.  Or how about going to a restaurant and just honestly asking your waiter or waitress for a refill?  Is that too much to ask when you see them flirting with their co-worker two tables away from yours.  How dare you want more Diet Coke!  Or what about the checker that hasn't gotten to take her break yet or do a shift change, and makes you feel guilty for getting in her line.  That's always fun.
 I know I sound like a geriatric fuddy-duddy and I know I sound like I just hopped off the pissy train, but I get so tired of seeing first-hand the ridiculous sense of entitlement, lack of work ethic, respect, and acknowledgement, some kids/teens/young adults possess.  There are common courtesies, manners, greetings that you just assume are universal, but apparently those things are falling by the wayside to the real problem, self-absorbedness.  Sadly, these sassy young 'uns, usually have parents that have enabled their selfish behavior.  --It's all about the child's convenience, their agenda, their wants, needs and caudled feelings superceed anyone and anything else.  Some parents are raising insensitive kids because they are so overly-sensitive in child rearing, and the children cannot begin to understand anything that doesn't revolve around them, pertain to them, or benefit them in some way.  Some children in the formative years are allowed to treat their parents like butlers, maids, peers, piggy banks, servants, and mainly like dirt, and it's often times too much work for a parent (plain 'ol lazy parenting) to correct or instruct, so the kids turn into little narcissistic monsters...monsters that eventually make their spoiled little ways into the work force...  at Target, Hobby Lobby and Sam's.  I found this excerpt in an article I was reading about Generation Y:

"Generation Y is much less likely to respond to the traditional command-and-control type of management still popular in much of today's workforce," says Jordan Kaplan, an associate managerial science professor at Long Island University-Brooklyn in New York. "They've grown up questioning their parents, and now they're questioning their employers. They don't know how to shut up, that's aggravating to the 50-year-old manager who says, 'Do it and do it now.' "

"The millennium generation has been brought up in the most child-centered generation ever. They've been programmed and nurtured," says Cathy O'Neill, senior vice president at career management company Lee Hecht Harrison in Woodcliff Lake, N.J. "Their expectations are different. The millennial expects to be stroked and told how they're doing."


Matt Berkley, 24, a writer at St. Louis Small Business Monthly, says many of his generation have traveled and had many enriching experiences, so they may clash with older generations they see as competition or not as skilled. "We're surprised we have to work for our money. We want the corner office right away," he says. "It seems like our parents just groomed us. Anything is possible. We had karate class, soccer practice, everything. But they deprived us of social skills. They don't treat older employees as well as they should."

I also found it interesting that Generation Y is considered to be kids born between 1977-2002.  Technically, I am generation Y (just barely, I was born in January of '77)?  Ha - nope, not me.  I cannot relate.  I know most of my generation has seen our parents work, work, work, and lost the quality of family life that so many of us all craved, but there must be some sort of balance.  Things have so flipped.  Now we may have an upcoming generation that may not be able to make it into work at all because their mommy called in for them!  We live in such an amazing technologically advanced age, that you just pray we don't lose our humanity in the process.  I love my iPhone (and hopefully iPad soon-hehe), email and Facebook, but pray for our upcoming generation.  I have no answers, only a short list of complaints, and the desire to understand why things are they way they are.  It's really sort of fascinating from a sociological aspect, and then really can be aggravating at times.  I did find it ironic, that in going to just 3 stores in the same day, they all shared such a common thread of Generation Y workers.  Interesting and eye-opening for sure.

Anthem, Because it Can't all be Wedding Cake...

The Underdog,
Spoon

Picture yourself in the living room
Your pipe and slippers set out for you
I know you think that it ain't too far


But I hear the call of a lifetime ring
Felt the need to get up for it
Oh you cut out the middleman
Get free from the middleman


You got no time for the messenger,
Got no regard for the thing that you don't understand,
You got no fear of the underdog,
That's why you will not survive!


I want to forget how conviction fits
But can I get out from under it?
Can I gut it out of me?
It can't all be wedding cake
It can't all be boiled away
I try but I can't let go of it


Can't let go of it,
Cause you don't talk to the water boy
And there's so much you could learn but you don't want to know,
You will not back up an inch ever,
That's why you will not survive,


The thing that I tell you now
It may not go over well
And it may not be photo-op
In the way that I spell it out


But you won't hear from the messenger,
Don't wanna know bout something that you don't understand,
You got no fear of the underdog,
That's why you will not survive! (Hey!)

An Author in my Own Right

Indulge me if you will,  this blog examines things I could talk all day about.... 

Books I could write, but probably won't:

Time After Time: Which Grocery line NOT to Get Into

Sarah's Cookbook: Recipes That Make My Husband Happy

Sarah's original book of goofy nonsense words.  *Shabooski*

Getting to know Tatoes: Why my dog is a person in disguise

Chubby Girls are Cool and Spunky, Skinny Girls are Hungry and Sad   (he he) ;)

An Insane Story From a Sane Gal: The Many Times I've been "Disowned" and Why

The Proper Way to Sort Laundry...  I think the title to this one will be "Greys and Pinks"

The Art of being Observant of your Surroundings

101 Ways to Kill Slugs

Help:  I'm drawn to Sock Monkeys and Hello Kitty and I Don't Know Why

The Photographer's Assistant's Guide to Making a Wedding go Smoothly

The Do's and Don'ts of Stepmotherhood.  ...or the alternative title: Making the Best of What You Have in the Face of Adversity

How to Keep your Orchids Alive 101

Designer Purses: Why my Closet is the Real Door to Narnia

The Miracles I Have Seen in My Lifetime

A Recovering Girl, in a Drinking World

Working for ATT, Great Job, or Corporate Prison?

Working From Home, The Best Thing Ever - Period.

Smalltown Girls Enjoy Culture Too

Procrastination Produces Stellar Results; My Journey as A Feeler.

People That Could Benefit From Therapy, and How to Stay Far Away From Them

Baking 101: Exact Measurements

Marrying Your Best Friend, Why Communication Solves Everything

Sarah's Expert Book of Scentsy Scents

Baskets: The Best Invention Known to Man

Things I Have Done That I am Not Proud Of, But Learned From

Nevada, Mo: Why I Dislike Country Music, Cowboy Boots, Big Belt Buckles and Ignorant People

Coasters, Use Them at My House or Die

Dogs Can Never Have Too Many Toys

God's Grace: What Saved a Wretch Like Me

The Key to Understanding: My Need To Understand and Psycho-Analyze, Psycho-Analyzed  (repetitive or redundant, you think?)

Sarah's Story  (All names have been changed to protect the innocent) ;)

Living in My Sanitary World: The 1001 Places You Can Stash Hand Sanitizer

The Empty Toilet Paper Roll, A Metaphor for Life?

Blogging, Just For Fun Because I Enjoy it ;)

This-n-That

I have been busy with this and that, last week I got out all my flowers, that always makes my heart sing.  I was also preparing for our Mother-Daughter Relay for life benefit at Church, which went so well!  We made $1600!
  Today I planted some Calla Lillies over by my office doors that my Secret Sister at church got me for Mother's Day.  They are purple and so pretty!!  It's humid today, which is welcome compared to the cold weather we have had lately, I was afraid one night we were going to have a frost that would kill my newly planted little jewels! 
The treadmill and I have a real love/hate relationship right now.  Grrr.  I am down 14 pounds; I am grateful and feeling good...a zillion more to go! *sigh*
  Tatoes is recovering like a champ from her little surgery.  The kids are jazzed only a few more days of school and David and I are full swing into the busy wedding season.  David painted our downstairs bedroom this week. We actually have a full fledged guest room now for when his mom comes!  It's also my scapbooking/craft room, its so nice to have room to spread out!  I am having fun decorating it and getting it all ready, I am going for the 'shabby chic' thing in there...I will post pics as it comes along.  
Lastly, I leave you with this tidbit...friends are the coolest, be a positive, encouraging friend to someone today.

I love that word "encourage" – when you do it, you literally put "courage in" to that person. Someone who may be more battered than you know, closer to going down or giving up than you could imagine. You never know when your encouragement might literally be the difference in that person's life. When you're bruised and hurting, it's that person in your corner who can get you back in the ring for another round.

--Ron Hutchcraft

My little buddy

 

                                             Maya and Tate

Tatoes has to have surgery tomorrow to remove several large bladder stones she has :(  This makes me mucho nervous.  I hate what she is going to have to go through, and I hate the pain she is in.  Thank goodness they gave us some pain meds for her so she isn't totally miserable until tomorrow.  I feel like I could throw up, I wasn't this nervous for my own surgery.  I am also NOT excited about the cost of all this, but she is worth every penny.  She is not just a dog, she is a little furball that has brought David and I alot of joy since she has come into our lives...daily this dog has brings me joy--honestly, how many people can you say that about?  She is excited when we walk in the door, and I feel sad when we leave her.  Sometimes when we are leaving, she runs out to the car and puts her little paws up on the car door, asking us if we will take her with us.  We come home and she knows the very last pair of shoes I have worn and finds them and lays with my shoes, without ever chewing one up.  To me, Tatoes is a little furry fourlegged person, and we treat her with just such dignity.  She gets grumpy, she pouts, she gets excited, she is silly, she is smart, and the absolute best snuggler, sorry David. ;) Nothing is more pleasing to her than ripping the stuffing out of one of her little stuffed rodent friends, getting the squeaker and relishing in her accomplishment by rolling around in it's fluffy "guts"!

In my perfect world, every dog would have a home and every home would have a dog.  She is that "once in a lifetime" dog....so yes, I am VERY nervous about tomorrow, and have asked for prayers for Miss Tatoes, and myself to not lose a marble.  God knows my heart and I am trusting in Him to protect it.

"I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive." - Gilda Radner

                    The Morton Salt Pup

               

Noah and Tate at the Doggy Dive in at the pool.

Tatoes and her BFF, Zoe Ducusin