Maturity

I started reading this short "quote" series on Christian Maturity by James Packer, I love it. I just wanted to share. While I like to think I a "mature" on some points, I am a total Kindergartener on others. I originally had been sending these to Maya day by day, as she has expressed so much excitement about her spiritual growth since she's been back from CIY. I'm encouraged with great joy to see her discover God's love for her; it's amazing. I thought these would be really relate-able for her, but also found them to be pretty universal for all of us, no matter the age. Hope you enjoy as much as I did.

The first mark of Christian maturity is the ability to deal constructively with reality, to face facts, to not cover up reality or call it something else, but to deal with it as it is. Mature people do not kid themselves.

The second mark is, adapting quickly to change. We all experience change, whether it be physical, at work, in the family, or whatever. I am amazed at how much some people change through the years while I remain exactly the same! Immature people resist change. It makes them nervous. But the mark of maturity is to adapt to change because change is inevitable.

The third mark of Christian maturity is freedom from the symptoms of tension and anxiety. The worried look, the frown, the ulcers, the palpitations of the heart - come because you are upset, anxious and worried. Maturing means you have begun to see that God is in control of this world. He is working out purposes that you do not always understand, but you accept it. He will take you through the deep water, not drown you in it. Maturity means you are learning to trust.

Fourth, it means to be satisfied more with giving than receiving. Some of you know that the joy of Christmas is not getting presents, but giving them. To see the joy in someone else's face when they get something they either need or want. That is a sign you are growing up. You are discovering the true values of life.

The fifth mark is, to relate to others with consistency, helpfulness and mutual satisfaction. Maturity is learning to get along with other people, to be a help, not a hindrance, to contribute to the solution and not to be always a part of the problem.

Finally, Christian maturity is sublimating and redirecting anger to constructive ends. Maturity is the ability to use the adrenaline that anger creates, not to lose your temper and add to the problem, but to correct a situation or to contribute to changing the nature of the difficulty.

The lazy girl's guide to eh, whatever. Installment 1 of ?

So I went to the store today, loving the fact that I got such a good, close parking spot. You know, that spot that's RIGHT next to the handicapped spots, and close enough to the entrance to give yourself a mental high-five? It's a real rarity to get that spot--go me! It's hot...who wants to walk on the radiating pavement very far, right? So I went in, did my thing, and came out to unload my groceries into my Element, and to my dismay, I was in a dilemma. Do I take my cart alllllll the way back into the store, or ditch it on the sad patch of concrete encased grass, only to get funny looks from others as I hop the curb, so the cart boy can fetch it next time he's on the prowl? Eh, I'm in my 30's...who cares what others think--they've done the same lazy thing before! After all, the cart boys get paid to take that clever little cart-herder machine that creates a tidy line of nested wire-basket clones to wheel back into the store, right? I'm providing them with some job security, which is sadly, more than my friends left at ATT, have these days. Anyhow, close parking spots rock, having to walk your cart allllll the way back into the store, or hoofing it to the nearest cart return really seems to defeat the entire purpose of getting that sweet spot in the first place!
Don't judge me.
Stay tuned, more lazy installments to come...or maybe not. I dunno.

Love? Love.

Is there anything to be gained by confrontation and the airing of feelings and issues with people that we are in conflict with?

Wellll....I guess that all depends on the issue, and the person with whom you are talking. I have always been a huge advocate of the importance of honesty and communication, it's the reason my marriage rocks. When it comes to friendships and family, it's just not always that simple. The older I get, the more fascinated I become by human nature, emotion, ego, motives, depth, or lack of...I will say it once again, people are a trip! I find it interesting when you learn the "why" of it all. What makes people do the crazy things they do, or say. I am very analytical, and can sometimes over-think things to death, while at the same times, I also see things that others may not. It's kind of a catch 22 in my personality to be able to have the spirit of discernment, while also not caring to discern because of my need to understand and comprehend the why of things. Anyhow, I know that we are commanded as Christians to love everyone. Can this really be possible, I keep asking myself? Because if we are really honest with ourselves, there are those people that have wronged us one way or another that really hurt our spirit. It's hard to say, I "love" this person that hurt my child, or my husband, or me. Still, we are commanded to do this, and knowing that, brings forth our accountability to God. So I suppose I try to rationalize people's behaviors, in order to try to love them in some way. For instance, person X is unkind or rude to me, and seems generally unhappy all the way around. I could just say, oh well, this person is a moron... orrrrr....I can rationalize that person X is having a rough time and isn't really snubbing me, rather going through something of which I am unaware. If there is something I have done to create a negative reaction out of person X, then I also will examine my own behavior and adjust accordingly.
Now alot of people would say, who cares, right? Sarah, seriously, who cares!? Well, the thing is, God cares. And to be commanded to love one another is NOT easy. It just isn't. Now I, of course, love my inner circle of family and friends and even acquaintances 'til the cows come home, but to branch outside that, to really say I "love" someone I'm not too crazy about; well, it's tough. So how do I go around this?
I prayed about this last night. And with just that instant peace that comes with knowing you turned your issue over to God, I slept well. I awoke to this thought today: To truly forgive and walk in love is to let it go, and not talk about it again. So that is what I am going to do. There is no need to rehash pains, or to "communicate" in any way. Loving someone can be as simple as just wishing them well, and harboring no bad feelings for them. Does that mean they need to be up in your face, or having dinner at your home? Nope. Just simple feelings of kindness. That is sometimes the only way people will allow us to love them. Sometimes communication can be a tool of the devil, or a God given comfort spoken through our lips. But, I am learning that communication is not always the answer. If I allow faith to play it's part, it shouldn't really matter. God is so large, He sees through us, and knows our thoughts before they become our own. Through prayer and scripture all things ARE possible. I am working on "loving" those people that I need to examine in my heart. If for no other reason, than because it's pleasing to God. I may just need to love them from afar. ;)

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law. The commandments, "Do not commit adultery", "Do not murder", "Do not steal", "Do not covet", and whatever other commandment there might be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself". Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.
Romans 13:8-10

Ah..so true!!

This totally made us laugh! We have experienced this scenario before. A bride books us, and then has a family member with an expensive (or not so expensive) camera offer to shoot the wedding for "free". Oh the sadness when that bride gets her wedding photos and realizes the mistake she has made. Sadly, bad wedding photos are forever. This video says it all!

Just a coupla ?'s

When something says it's a "new and improved" formula...and it's a product that's been on the market for say...25 years...then is it safe to assume that the old formula sucks?

Why do we say "excuse me" or "pardon me" when we want someone else to move?  There really is no cause for an excuse or pardon then right?

Some expiration dates say "use by 3-12-10" and some say "sell by 3-12-10".  So on the ones that say to sell it by a certain date, how long is it then good for after it's been sold?  And what if there is just a random date stamped on it with no "use by" or "sell by"??? Ahhhhh!

Did you know we all have little bugs that live in our eyelashes?  Yup--we do. Google it.  It's nasty.

mid-July jazz

Well, it's a girl.  Tatoes has a new sister, Miss Frankie-Boo Coleman.  Frankie is a chihuahua that actually found us, instead of us finding her.  She is adjusting nicely, and loving her new digs.  I am having fun playing dress up with her in Tatoes outgrown clothes.  Hard to believe little Tate was just 7 pounds when we got her, now she weighs in at 12.  Frankie weighs 6 pounds and eats EVERYTHING, she is a very hungry little dog!  I never envisioned us getting another dog, for Tatoes is my dog soulmate...however, little Frankie stole our hearts, and is going to be wonderful company for Tatoes when we are away.  We have always felt guilty leaving Tatoes alone, now she will have a buddy to hang with.  They are really similar in personality, and both just crave "lovins".  We aren't short on that around here, and love snuggling on a warm puppy.  Now David and I don't have to fight over Tatoes anymore, we can take turns!

Maya leaves for CIY in Carbondale, IL tomorrow; I am praying this is going to be a great time for her.  It's a great Christian Summer program for High School age kids.  Reality keeps smacking me that she's going into High School this year!  Doesn't really seem possible she is that age.  Wow...just wow.  Time sure does fly. Seems like just yesterday we were walking holding hands everywhere we went and exchanging "I love you's" until one of us "won" (the last person to say I love you). Ah...sweet memories I will always cherish.

David and I both got the new iPhone 4, so far so good.  I really like mine, the ability to do HD video is sweet, as well as the toggling between apps, and long battery life.  I don't seem to be having any antenna issues that others had complained about.  I really like Face time too...lots of fun to be able to see someone and visit, just a bummer that they have to have the iPhone 4 too, to be able to do it.  iPads are cool as well, and David has a new mistress, her name is iMac...he's in love. :)  His editing time is now almost cut in half, this baby flies!  Good for him, what a killer investment for the biz.  I got to do my first client consultation with the iPad a few days ago.  It was totally awesome.  So much easier than flipping through that clumsy huge portfolio that was 3 years old.  This keeps it new and fresh...totally excellent.  I was able to show my client a full wedding at the venue she had chosen, I just went to that folder and voila...pictures!  Good stuff. 

I have a nasty Summer cold.  ICK!  I feel like dirt.  David had a wedding today, normally I would have gone with him, but I just wasn't up to it today.  So I stayed in bed and watched some movies on the iPad and got all the laundry done.  I had never watched Donnie Darko, and had heard it was interesting and cool...and yeah, it kinda was, interesting concept, but I am just not that cool.  I get so sick of Christians in movies being portrayed as idiots, close-minded bigots, and unintelligent simpletons.  But, I guess that's cool in godless Hollywood.  Anything to escape accountability and morality, because the opposite always sells.  Although I look at films like the Passion of the Christ, (Mel Gibson, for the record, is completely NUTS) and Fireproof (even though the acting left alot to be desired) and how well they did at the box office.  I think people do want more entertainment with relevant thematic Christian messages, but it's just not popular to make those movies, or claim Christ.  Ah, our society...the more depraved the better, I spose.  (Insert frowny face here).  I personally love documentaries, they are my favorite types of movies, and while this may make me a nerd, I like to stay informed about a variety of topics this way.  Typically most of them have some sort of agenda or bias, but nevertheless, even if to play "devil's advocate" with the topic, I come out more educated one way or the other.

Well, it's time for some Nyquil and the snuggling of pups. Here's an eyebrow raising thought for today:

While sitting on the bank of a river one day, I picked up a solid round stone from the water and broke it open. It was perfectly dry in spite of the fact that it had been immersed in water for centuries. The same is true of many people in the Western world. For centuries they have been surrounded by Christianity; they live immersed in the waters of its benefits. And yet it has not penetrated their hearts; they do not love it. The fault is not in Christianity, but in men's hearts, which have been hardened by materialism and intellectualism.

~Sadhu Sundar Singh

Why I love urbandictionary.com

This is hilarious...and alot of it is dead on...and some just giggleworthy!

Word of the day:  indie

1. The term: Short for independent rock. In terms of music it would be independent of major labels/mainstream stuff.

History: grew out from 60s garage, 70s punk, and 80s post punk it started in the mid 80s as alternative/college radio music. Once nirvana hit big the alternative genre split: the popular side was just alternative(Smashing Pumpkins, Hole, No Doubt, etc.) and the other half that wasn't mainstream(by choice or not) became indie rock(Pavement, Sebadoh, Built To Spill, etc).
Some bands have signed to major labels but are still considered indie(Modest Mouse, etc.). Go figure.
Sound: In the begining indie sounded like alternative(because it was) but it grew more experimental and weird. In Britain indie has more of a typical sound like Radiohead, Muse, etc. rather than a definition based on 'the scene.'
The scene: if you think all indie folks are cooler than other people then... well.. you're mostly right. The main point is, don't take the scene and the whole hipster attitude seriously. No one does. And if you do, well, then I'm cooler than you.

2. A gloriously vague term for Independent Music. Basically unsigned or more obscure bands (It's odd that Radiohead and REM are considered indie...). While the indie scene is known for it's ridiculous elitism, this doesn't spill over and hurt what's most important....the music. One of the few genres left that can at least carry a tune without screaming like a moron or crying.

(Examples of Indie music)
80's- Joy Division, Sonic Youth, The Smiths
90's- Pavement, Radiohead, The Pixies, Happy Mondays (Are they considered dance music or indie rock?).
Now- The Shins, Bright Eyes, Death Cab For Cutie/The Postal Service, Rilo Kelly, Modest Mouse.
Indie listener- "Do you guys carry Crooked Rain by Pavement or Closer by Joy Division?
Confused Best Buy employee- "Uhh, no. We do have a wall of My Chemical Romance albums behind you".
Indie listener- "Nevermind"

3. Independent music. The anti-"emo". (well, maybe like emo's second cousin twice-removed with more talent, skill, and IQ).  Indie people generally like their lives.

 the state of being "indie":
1)being unable to talk to anyone about your music.
2)but knowing that, in the process, you're cooler than the people you try to talk to about it.
3)talking to poseurs about Death Cab for Cutie and they had never heard of them before the Twilight New Moon soundtrack came out and suddenly Meet Me on the Equinox is their favorite song.
indie listener: The Shins(before Garden State)? Muse? The XX? Screaming Trees?...anyone? Bueller? anyone?

4. a. Music released on an independent label
    b. Any music slightly left of mainstream
    c. Not always about lost love, sometimes about Christmas in Zoos and inanimate objects breathing.
"Yeah, I'm into Indie"
"You don't look it"
"Do I have to?"

July's word of the month: Acceptance

I'm baaaaaaack! :) Yeah, wow...what a wonderfully fun month June was: Relay for Life, weddings galore, and David's mom's visit, and hosting charity garage sales, and lotsa fun outings to Branson, new iMac for David and iPads for us both, and new iPhone 4's on the wayyyy - busy as all get out!  It's July and we are having a weekend to catch our breath due to a wedding cancellation, and it's actually been such a blessing in disguise. So here's some random ramblings I was thinking about today...

I'm feeling great, like really great.  David and I had a conversation the other night...about me not having a family anymore.  He said, "you know how great our marriage is, most people don't get what we have together.  Yes, you don't have bio-kids, and yes, your parents are from another planet, buuuuut you have ME!!"  ...And what a friend I have in my husband; he's the complete package.  One poignant thing my mom always said to me that keeps resounding in my mind is, "nobody gets it all".  She was right...noone does.  So it's a trade off, in my mind at this point.  Healthy functioning marriage, amazingly fulfilling and lucrative business VS. in my mind, what should have been...  Interesting to ponder.  Then I bring God into play(or rather He brings me into play)...and David and I, for a year or so now, have talked about traveling while doing mission work, or being able to use our photography for good. This sounds strange, I am sure, but I haven't really prayed about God's plan to implement David and I....I'm almost scared to...does that make sense?  Sometimes things manifest that are beyond our control...and what if He takes me outside my comfort zone, and I'm not ready!  I digress... Well, anyway...my point is, there are reasons, God implored reasons, why life is the way it is right now. On your darkest day, with your worst hurt, there are reasons.  I did what God laid on my heart as far as trying to reconcile with true forgiveness and peace...and was stomped into the ground by Satan's handiwork of embittered hearts and sickened souls, resulting in my grief-filled depression this last Winter.  So now I must guard my heart as I move forward. {Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23}.  Sooooooo, I remain faithful, and this, combined with David's unwavering support, amazingly positive friends, a nifty dog-buddy, a functioning relationship with the kids, and my God who promises not to give me more than I can handle, just wait and take in life.  Breath it in.  I'm just sitting tight, relishing in the sweet happy moments of date nights, and girl outings with friends, the joys of shooting a wedding, cuddling my pup, and working for good causes.  Good moments abound, and my estranged family misses out.  I mourn only for a moment, a fleeting thought...then delight in the gifts God keeps giving me, because at the end of the day, I am so grateful for my life, and my family.  God knows my heart...and this thought too, keeps me content, even in strife.  It's ok.  "Acceptance and hope" is the last stage of the of 7 stages of grief, and I have felt them all.  I accept my new life without my family, and hope and pray it will be different some day. In the mean time, I will keep my head up, my heart humble and open, and LOVE my precious life.  It is a good life, and it's amazing to be able to be this happy.  I don't have it all, but I sure love and am grateful for what I do have.